** 2nd cum for Master **
i am sitting on the train at the moment on my way to meet Master. Right now i am feeling rather excited but also quite nervous. My time is divided between thinking about what is to come; the beautiful English countryside rushing past the window and watching DVDs.
At Euston changing into the clothes Master had brought for me for was a surreal and exciting experience. Not surprisingly i felt quite self-conscious and was convinced everyone was starting at me, but in reality i was perhaps remarkably indistinguishable in the crowd. Putting on the clothes, checking my bag at left luggage and only carrying things Master wanted me to take made the whole experience seem very real.
My feelings right now are quite hard to put into writing: a mixture of nervousness, excitement and optimism. More than anything i am keen for this to go well. For so long now i have been searching for a Master to serve and the knowledge that it is only a matter of hours away is quite unusual. i am keen to impress my Master and to serve him without hesitation and without reservation.
For perhaps the first time i am not really sure what to write. Staring at my screen, i feel unable to come up with proper words to describe my emotions. The best way i can describe my attitude at the moment is one of just letting go and serving Master and enjoying this experience for all it is meant to be.
For such a long time i have waited and wanted for this experience; now it is here and no i am more nervous than anything i just keep telling myself to breath deeply; relax; trust in Master and just “go with it”.
Above all else though, i simply can’t wait to meet Master and begin!
From this point forward my post is being written after i met with Master. i am in the process of coming down from a post-cum high and my cock is still tingling from the estim as i write this part of the blog!
The initial meeting with Master went well: the collaring at the train station also happened so fast and before i knew it we were on the way to Master’s house. The drive to Master’s house was rather quiet. In situations where i am feeling either nervous or unsure of myself; i have two different types of reactions. In a professional setting, the dominant side of my personality tends to take charge and i either talk a lot and/or attempt to take charge. My other reaction, which sometimes occurs in a professional situation when i am surrounded by a number of high-ranking people, is to become shy and introverted.
In bondage situations i usually tend to become quite shy and tend not to talk. i was a little bit worried i was initially too quiet; but contented myself with Master’s early advice that i could speak when spoken too.
Shortly after we arrived at Master’s house, i began to relax completely and i felt quite comfortable and at home. i think (from my perspective at least) that once i began to relax my normal personality began to emerge!
The afternoon was spent getting to know Master’s house and Master’s lifestyle and i also helped Master finish constructing a wooden horse. i felt very comfortable in Master’s house and had no trouble with the Rules. The only time i felt rather self-conscious was going to the toilet and passing wind and defecating with the door open, but i think that in time even this will pass.
i felt that Master went out of His way to make me feel comfortable, relaxed and reassured in both His presence and His house and i am extremely grateful for this. The overall effect of this was that by the time we went out for dinner, i felt quite relaxed about wearing the more visible padlocked collar and addressing Master as “Sir”. i took the approach of ignoring the few people around us and focusing solely on Master.
Eating out with Master was great! All my life i have always enjoyed surprises (they appeal to my personality) and so i quite enjoyed having Master make all the decisions in the restaurant. It felt great to not even have to bother to pick up the menu. i think it’s the first time in my adult life i have ever gone out to a restaurant and not known anything about the menu, the available options or even the cost of an item!
Back at Master’s house, i did some chores for Master and helped Master with some research while Master concentrated on His work. My first bondage session with Master was fantastic and it was great to try out the new wooden horse Master had created.
In my opinion, only two things played on my mind during the session. Firstly, i sometimes worry that i talk too much during BDSM sessions. This seems to be a historical evolutionary feature for me: when i was much younger and only starting out with my early BDSM experiences (18 to 20 or so) a lot of Master’s commented that I was too “starfish” like and did not really communicate how i was feeling. i think sometimes i know do the opposite and comment on things too much; but i think it is better to over-communicate rather than under-communicate.
The other thing that played on my mind was cumming. Master said to me “Do you want to cum?” The honest answer to that question was “yes”, but i felt that want i wanted was irrelevant. My rather feeble response to Master “only if you want to cum” (or that was my intention) at least. Eventually i orgasmed when Master told me to cum.
For me, a slave has no say over whether he cums or not, so i wanted to say to Master “yes, i want to cum but only if you want me to cum” if you don’t want me to cum, i don’t want to cum then!
Being edged by Master was a fabulous experience because since i have been in chastity, the only hand that i have felt touch my cock (except from my own hands when cleaning and putting the device on) are Master’s hands. That was quite a surreal experience and made the impact of Master’s touch so much more powerful.
The other element i liked about the experience of cumming with Master was that it did not extend the session. Not unsurprisingly given my self-identification as a slave, i like long BDSM sessions. Previously i have always been reluctant to cum for fear that it will end the session (which it usually does). Given i am here with Master for at least another three days, there is no fear of an orgasm ending “the session” in this situation!
All in all a fantastic day and a wonderful start to this new chapter in my life as a slave. i am not particularly sure what my expectations were to begin with, but i do feel as if my expectations have been exceeded!
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