** 2nd day chaste **
Control is a fundamental element of the Master-slave relationship and in my opinion one of the central elements that distinguishes the Master-slave relationship from the Master-sub relationship (the others being the question of limits and the continuity aspect of the relationship). The first and perhaps most obvious thing to note about control is that control is voluntarily surrendered by the slave to the Master at the outset; for even in the period of consideration the slave surrenders some degree of control to the Master. Once voluntarily surrendered and then accepted, the Master's control remains permanent until he relinquishes the slave. The degree of control may certainly vary at different types and in different situations, but the fundamental existence of the control does not.
I am a lawyer by profession and training, and therefore for me, I want to identify the precise moment when control is first surrendered and accepted. For me, I believe control is first surrendered when an honest and genuine slave opens a discussion with a Master with a view to being considered for service. In contractual terms, this is the "offer" or the "willingness to surrender" the control. The Master indicates his acceptance of the control by issuing his first instruction to the slave (in contractual terms, the "acceptance"). At this point control is surrendered and the confirmation of this occurs when the slave actually carries out the instruction (the contractual analogy is not precise here, but this is presumably the "consideration"). Regardless of how difficult or how menial this first command from the Master is, by accepting it and obeying the slave has surrendered control because he is doing something purely because the Master has ordered as such. The sincerity and genuineness of the slave can then be measured by how willingly he does as he is told, and then secondly, how consistently he accepts this control.
In my situation; although I have not yet met my Master, there is no doubt in my mind that I am under his control. Attempting to isolate when the exact surrender and acceptance of this occurred for my Master and I is a little bit difficult. We had chatted previously in late December and I had agreed to meet Master but we had not had many in depth discussions and I had really only committed to meeting Master. I feel that my relationship with Master has blossomed in recent weeks. Beginning with Friday 11 March 2011 I was reporting in every morning to Master, so I think it is safe to say that "by" 11 March 2011 I had surrendered control to my Master; although we were in the process of talking before that.
Master may choose to exercise this control in a number of ways and the level of his control will no doubt increase. Over the last week or so Master's control has consistently increased. For example, although I was sort of in a more basic form of chastity before Master, I would know not dream or even think of cumming without Master's permission; I check in with Master at multiple times during the day; and I maintain this blog daily. Other areas where Master has exercised control are on amendments to my slaveboys profile and how I interact with other Masters. Master has requested that I do not met with any other Masters during this consideration stage, so therefore on recon or elsewhere while I am polite to other Masters (as a slave should be) I decline all invitations to meet and am also declining invitations to chats. I do not yet identify myself to other Masters as my Master's slave (to do so without being confirmed in that status would be inappropriate and disrespectful for my Master) but I am unambiguously clear that I am not in position to communicate with other Masters at this time.
Having established the nature of control, I would like to discuss types of control. Within the Master-slave relationship there are two basic types of control that a Master exercises over his slave: firstly, indirect control, which is when the slave is in the vanilla world living and working away from his Master; and secondly, direct control, when the slave is physically present with his Master and serving him.
Indirect control is a particular area where the Master-slave relationship fundamentally differs to the Master-sub relationship. I have already outlined areas above where my Master has exercised control in my daily life at the moment. I know this will continue to expand and will include uniforms in private and wearing a certain type of collar amongst other things. Indirect control is one of the hardest areas for a slave, because it is in this context that the slave must be mindful of his status and his obligations to his Master while also balancing the demands of friends, family, work and real-life situations. The balance can be a difficult one but is by no means impossible. If the slave is genuinely committed to his Master, and the Master is pragmatic and reasonable (which by default most genuine Masters are); the indirect control can be a liberating and fulfilling opportunity for the slave.
Drawing on my situation; I envision that when I am in the vanilla world my Master will exercise his indirect control by requiring me to live by certain Rules and regulations. This control is indirect because my Master is not physically present to compel me to obey; but the control is still there because if I do not obey I will obviously be disrespecting my Master and possibly (and ultimately) could lose my Master forever; and for a slave there can be nothing worse. Other aspects of the Master's indirect control can be physically maintained by the Master: chastity devices are a key example of this. I already adjust my lifestyle to incorporate Master's control and I will continue to do so and I look forward to doing so. Master has already demonstrated reasonableness: I am still allowed to wear underwear because I find it difficult to go about my daily life in chastity without the support that underwear provides.
Turning from indirect control, I am going to write about direct control; because I think this is where the mindset of the genuine slave can be most visible. I wrote in my blog yesterday about that wonderful moment when the slave passes from his Master's indirect control to his Master's direct control. I am very lucky that my Master is allowing me a rather unique transitional period from indirect control to direct control and this is represented by the changing of out of my usual vanilla world clothes into the clothes that he has chosen for me in London. I arrive at the place where I am to meet my Master already in the clothes he has chosen for me, with the limited items he has allowed me to bring. And then I will be collared and at this point, I can relax completely and I can feel completely liberated.
When a slave is under the direct control of his Master, his mindset changes completely. In the vanilla world the slave - like all other people - must make certain decisions that are part and parcel of daily life. Decisions such as what to wear, what to act, where to go, how to act etc. When the slave is with his Master however, this all changes. The slave no longer has to worry about making decisions or exercising caution or anything like that; because his Master will do this for him. All the slave needs to do is three things:
(a) Obey his Master's directions and orders;
(b) Act in a manner that is becoming of a slave, demonstrates respect to his Master and which does not bring his Master any concern or embarassement; and
(c) Exercise the basic common sense and awareness for his own safety and the safety of his Master (for example, a slave can still look before crossing the road!)
The bulk of the decisions about the slave's lifestyle and conduct are now outside of the slave's control. Although the Master may ask the slave's opinion; this does not alter the fact the slave has no power. The Master will make all decisions where a choice is required, ranging from determining whether the slave needs to wear clothing in a particular situation to ordering food at a restaurant to determining how a slave's time should be spent.
A necessary precursor to this control is that the slave willingly surrenders his independence. The slave surrenders mobile, wallet, keys etc for he does not need those. His Master will care for him and provide for him. The reality of this direct control will be liberating to a slave. It means that a slave, if given the opportunity to eat with his Master at table at cafe, can focus solely on supporting the Master in anyway he wishes; whether it be through polite conversation or something else. There is no need for the slave to bother with even looking at the menu or thinking about what he wants; the Master will make all these decisions and decide appropriately. Similarly, for even the most base things the slave will now seek permission: to go to the toilet, to have a drink etc. Between a Master and slave there can be no embarrassement for there is no relationship of equality: the Master has power, the slave has none.
I think the reality of such control will be a wonderful experience and I am looking forward to it more than anything. I think the control is though, by very nature, exercised and followed sensibly. In my understanding, direct control works because it's underpinned by a series of "Rules" or standing orders. These Rules outline how the slave is to live and conduct themselves in the Master's presence and the reality is that these Rules provide the slave with clarification on the overwhelming bulk of the daily choices he faces. The Rules provide when the slave must seek permission and what the slaves responsibilities are.
The other way the situation works is that the slave must be sensible and realistic. For example, if the Master has ordered the slave to prepare a meal; the slave asks the Master what he would like and then prepares the meal. In preparing the meal the slave might have to ask the Master for a question of clarification about something of substance, but he does need to ask the Master silly or mundane questions. If the meal is to be steak and vegetables; the slave would obviously not ask the Master for permission to embark on each stage of the cooking process. He would ask the Master perhaps what vegetables he wanted and how the steak was to be cooked and when told would set about doing it. Likewise, an order to "prepare dinner" would necessarily include setting the table as appropriate and preparing for the dinner more generally.
A good slave does not need to be micromanaged and a Master does not want a slave that is robotic and incapable of showing basic initiative.
For me, the other basic aspect of direct control is that the Rules provide the level of conduct and lifestyle the Master expects of me, regardless of the situation, unless he tells me otherwise. By way of example, the Rules provide that the slave is to be naked at all times; if the Master tells me to open the door to a guest and I am naked; it is not my role or place to tell the Master I am naked. Obviously the Master knows I am naked and obviously he has already decided that the person at the door will not mind or be offended by my nakedness! The liberty of direct control is that the slave does not need to worry about his own reputation, embarrassment, or own conduct. This is all determined and decided by the Master.
How this control will work was a question that I raise, albeit indirectly, with my Master last evening in the context of conversation. Master stated his general view that he preferred silence and I asked whether that meant I as a slave should not initiate conversation. Master's answer indicated that it depended on the context but that he was not given to unnecessary social chatter.
From what Master has said, I know that my general approach will be one of silence unless Master speaks to me. If Master initiates conversation I will obviously engage, but it is not my role to interrupt Master from his thoughts or work. I proceed about with my duties quietly and unobtrusively. I might interrupt at appropriate times to offer Master a cup of tea or engage in small chitchat while assisting Master in some particular task; but I will not initiate a discussion of substance unless Master wants me to.
To an outside person this might seem particularly draconian, but to me it seems perfectly natural. I am an intelligent and thoughtful person; well-travelled, well-read and well-informed. I have had opportunities in life to dine with judges and Prime Ministers; yet here I am expressing a willingness (in fact a desire) to only speak when spoken to! I know that my Master knows that the kind of slave I am; and I know that when my Master wants to speak to me, my Master will. At it's every essence it is about accepting my slave status and role. There is a time and a place for everything; that time and place is for my Master to decide. That is what gives me comfort.
A Master-slave relationship can be intellectually and mentally rewarding; and in fact should be so. But even in discussions about controversial matters or when putting forward a different opinion, a slave should always do so with respect and politeness to his Master. If his Master at any time insists on something, a slave should always yield, for that is the appropriate response.
In the event that the Master and slave are in company with others, regardless of the situation, the slave should never speak unless spoken to or it is absolutely necessary. If required to speak, the slave should speak politely and succinctly. The slave should not partake in the conversation unless required and any the slave says should support without question any comment by the Master. It is crucial in the presence of others that the slave does not to indicate even the slightest difference of opinion from his Master. If the slave does have a difference of opinion or different thoughts, he can raise those privately with his Master if his Master wishes. In public, the slave must never bring his Master into disrepute.
I know this post is already quite long and I hope it has not rambled too much. I hope my ideas have come across as realistic and as sensible as I know they are.
At the end of the day, the essence of control is accepting that the Master makes key decisions for the slave. Over the last few days the issue of having a PA has been on mind a great deal and I have previously blogged about it. In his comments on Monday night Master said that he had made a decision about this and that he would let me know when we chatted again. Last night Master did not mention his decision and I did not ask. I could tell that Master had had a long day in Liverpool; the question of whether I was to get a PA was not urgent; I knew Master had made a decision so therefore there was no need for me to make further suggestions or discuss it further. As much as I would have liked to know, I knew it was not appropriate to raise the matter again. Master will tell me his decision when he feels it appropriate that I know. And I will accept that decision without question for that is the essence of control.
I have voluntarily surrendered control to my Master because I trust him. I know my Master will make the best decisions for me. It is relief for me to know that I do not have to worry about these matters, because it frees my mind to focus on Master and ensuring that his life and his household are running as smoothly as possible. Even the most basic of decisions can be removed from me: I will go to the toilet when Master tells me to or permits me to. My mind free of unnecessary clatter, I can ensure that I can be the slave my Master needs at any particular moment, whether it is a domestic slave to perform household chores, a pet to sit at his feet while he reads the paper, a respectful listener to his views on the latest crisis at Westminster. I know Master will does what is best for him and what is best for my Master is best for me. I don't worry about my own needs because I know that Master has already thought of them.
Finally, not not only am I natural slave, I am naturally kinky and I do have a sense of fun. Master said that if he did not want me to talk he could always gag me. The image of myself doing housework or preparing dinner gagged so I do not disturb Master is probably one of my favourite fantasies at the moment and makes me painfully hard in chastity device.
I want to finish by saying "Thank you Master". For everything.
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